Inauguration Wrap Up

(Originally published 5/25/11)
I finally watched last night’s North Miami Beach City Mayor and Council Inauguration on the city’s website.  I was unable to hear all the speeches last night in person because of the crowd, so I bring you my report tonight. 

First I want to extend my sincere thanks to outgoing Councilman McKenzie Fleurimond for his gracious, generous and truly genuine speech.  He was so sincere as he expressed his gratitude to everyone in the city, including his colleagues, the residents and city staff for everything they have done to help him during his service.  When McKenzie asked the audience to give his opponent, who won the race, a round of applause I was incredibly moved.  It was truly stunning.  He also congratulated and welcomed our new Mayor, George Vallejo, and spoke very highly of him.  No one ever said McKenzie didn’t give good speech!  Now if I can just shake some of that liberal thing out of him, I might encourage him to run again in a future election.

Okay, okay, kidding about the liberal thing.  (Sort of.)

Defeated ex-mayor Myron Rosner, on the other hand, gave a speech that highlighted just how small and petty we already know that he is. As I wrote in my earlier column, Myron (wearing the omnipresent Siz Construction shirt) managed to thank his family, especially his wife and his “amazing kids” who he used as shark bait in the political arena, er, I mean who supported him during his campaign.  He bragged on his “amazing” daughter, then thanked his “amazing” friends and city staff who supported him.  Everyone was just so “amazing,” with an “amazing showing of support.”  He had “supporters” who were just “amazing,” who “were there from morning til night.”  Of course, he didn’t mention that he had to pay them to be “amazing” or that he drove around from precinct to precinct yelling at them to work harder.  He then had the absolute incredible chutzpah to talk about “good leadership,” stating that it’s “when you can give something back that is better than when you received it.”  He actually BELIEVES THAT HE HAS DONE THAT!  WTF?  He then had the cojones to say that he gives us “back the city better than when [he] took it over not only eight years ago but two years ago.”  HE’S DELUSIONAL!  Can anyone think of even one way this city is better than when he took office as mayor two years ago?  I know I can’t.

Myron then threatened to stay here and continue to try to make our lives as miserable as he is.  Of course, his actual words were that he plans on staying here and be available if anyone still needs him.  OH, PUH-LEEZE!  We need him like we need a bubonic plague!  He threatened, “You will be seeing me around this city.  I will not be going away!

Folks, you know what that means, don’t you?  Now that he has officially taken off his “mayor’s hat” and now that he’s officially unemployed, be prepared to be served with code violations up the yin yang!  Also, make sure your window shades are drawn at all times unless you want pictures of you in your birthday suit plastered on some obscure Peeping Tom website.  I’m just saying.

What Myron did NOT do was acknowledge the existence of his successor, MAYOR GEORGE VALLEJO!  He still has not congratulated him, nor has he even bothered to shake George’s hand.  WHAT A FREAKING PUTZ!

He left the room to tepid applause, pausing at the elevator door, but not before Vice Mayor Barbara Kramer asked Madam City Clerk to administer the Oath of Office to Mayor-Elect George Vallejo, at which time the room burst into an unabashed, extended round of applause, cheers and whoops of joy!  Myron just had to know that for all intents and purposes, he’s Gone, Baby, Gone.  Good riddance!

Mayor George Vallejo was then sworn in by his lovely wife, Sandy, and surrounded by his mother and his sons, who all worked tirelessly on his campaign, along with his many, many supporters.  It was absolutely wonderful watching George take his rightful place on the dais in the Mayor’s seat!

He gave a fabulous speech, welcoming all elected officials in attendance, including former Mayor Ray Marin and Councilman Kenneth A. De Filippo, and bringing together all residents in the community.  He acknowledged that we have challenges in the city, and then stated that he is “ready to do whatever it takes to meet those challenges.”  The four areas he will be focusing on are the city finances, business promotion, crime and productive environment at city hall.  I’m not going to repeat his speech here, but I urge you to watch the video if you haven’t already.  Needless to say, George is an inspiration to all!

Councilman Philippe Derose was sworn in and he reaffirmed his commitment to serve.  He thanked his colleagues, welcomed the new Mayor and Councilwoman Marlen Martell and thanked the former candidates for running.  Mr. Derose was very cognizant of the fact that we are in for tough times and is willing to work hard to do whatever it takes to get through them.  Councilman Derose is a class act!

By contract, next up to be sworn in was none other than our very own Killer Bee, Phyllis Smith, who was sworn in by her daughter and granddaughter.  Phyllis took the time to obnoxiously ask her granddaughter to raise her hand if she wants grandma to win the race.  Gee, what a special moment.  She started at minute 41.42, thanked her opponents for giving the residents a choice.  Yeah, NOW she says that!  All she did during the campaign was kvetch that she had to campaign and had no help.  All of a sudden she had a “long list” of people to thank.  And thank them she did, between kvetching about how sick she was and that there was too many people to thank.  Phyllis just went on and on and on in typical Phyllis fashion.  She wants the next four years to be about “hard work and good honorability.”  I guess Phyllis needed her Sarah Palin moment.  I wonder if she can see city hall from her house.  Phyllis then went into a story about General Patton.  I think it was General Patton, but I can’t quite be sure about that.  Her point was that she found the strength to go on.  All I can say is that I hope we have the strength to endure four more years of Phyllis’ bleeding heart and her infinitely inappropriate way of butting in, taking over, saying stupid things and putting us to sleep with the intricate details of her mundane life.  G-d help us all!  Her door may always be open, but so is her mouth.  She ended her diatribe at 49.45.  Praise the Lord and pass the popcorn!  That’s 8.03 minutes I’ll never get back.

Councilwoman Beth Spiegel was sworn in by her husband, Harvey Pitterman.  Harvey wanted to say a couple words, but unfortunately forgot to speak into the microphone.  He’s a really cool guy, wish I could have heard what he said.  They make such a cute couple!  Beth spoke from the dais, with a microphone, and thanked the residents who elected her and she accepted her responsibility with humility and a vow to work together for the unity of the city.  She thanked her husband and her brother, and that was it.  BRAVO!

Councilman Frantz Pierre was sworn in by Reverand Dan Gautier.  He called up two additional ministers to help.  Guess Frantz is gonna need all the divine help he can get for the next four years.  I know we will – trying to understand what the hell he’s talking about.  Sorry, but in all the years he’s been sitting on that dais, every time he speaks I inevitably ask the person next to me, “What did he say?”  Whatever.  Who cares?  I don’t like him, I don’t trust him, and I just know one of these days he’s going to get his just desserts.  He is one sneaky, manipulative, liar, and I plan to expose him for the fraud that he is.  Even scarier than his being a North Miami Beach Councilman is the fact that he’s a school teacher in a Miami-Dade County Public School.  If you want to hear the nonsense that he spewed in his way too long acceptance speech, in which he referred to himself in the third person twice, watch the video.  It’s not worth my even trying to interpret it here.  ‘Nuf said.

Finally, the Prom Queen of NMB, Barbara Kramer (private joke here) was sworn in by her awesome father, Harold Monuse.  She was joined by her husband, Larry and her sons.  Barbara congratulated her colleagues and the new Mayor and Councilwoman, and then thanked the zillions of people who supported, endorsed and helped her win her seat back.  She rededicated herself to continue to serve the residents of North Miami Beach and work in their best interests.  I smiled and blushed when Barbara called me her personal 24 hour support system.  Sweetie, that’s what friends are for!  Her voice cracked when she thanked her wonderful husband, Larry, who I personally will attest is her biggest fan.  Next to me, of course.  :-)

Next up, newly elected Councilwoman Marlen Martell, a/k/a A Breath of Fresh Air, was sworn in by Pastor Abraham Rivera.  (I interrupt this blog to report that while Marlen was taking her seat, Phyllis had to obnoxiously butt in tell the Mayor he needed to introduce some other elected officials who had come in during the proceedings.  I know she believes she was being helpful, but the truth is, it was inappropriate and intrusive.  These additional introductions could have waited until after Marlen gave her acceptance speech.  Phyllis just can’t help but hog the spotlight.  Jeez!)

Now, where was I?

Oh, yeah, Marlen Martell tearfully and sincerely thanked practically every resident and employee in the City of North Miami Beach.  She thanked her wonderful family and said a few words in Spanish, which made me cry because I love that beautiful language.  By the end of her speech, Marlen was crying tears of joy.  By the time she thanked her amazing husband, Steve, I was in a puddle.  We are so very fortunate to have Marlen as our Councilwoman.  I’m also happy I watched this video in the privacy of my room since I don’t cry in public.  I just don’t do that.

Finally, George wrapped it up and let us know that he’s not into marathon Council meetings.  Meeting adjourned.

Amen to that!

Stephanie Kienzle
“Spreading the Wealth”

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