Back by Popular Demand (Originally published 4/12/11)

PRICELESS!

Published June 29, 2011 | By Stephanie Kienzle
Application to Run for Mayor of North Miami Beach:  $180.00

Bus Bench Campaign Signs:  $20,000.00

 

 

 

Filing a Fraudulent Campaign Treasurer’s Report:  PRICELESS!

 

 

Yeah, I know… Again with those fakakta bus benches?  Yes.  Again.

Ever since mayor Myron Rosner put up those fake “happy holiday” bus bench signs in November, 2009, I have actually lost sleep over this mishagas.  I admit, they have become my obsession and my pet peeve.

Now that he has turned them into Official Campaign Bus Bench Signs, and somehow bullied City Attorney Darcee Siegel into convincing herself (she certainly hasn’t convinced ANYONE else) that they aren’t really Official Campaign Bus Bench Signs, I have set out to prove three things:

1.  As Pre-Campaign Pretend “Happy Holiday” But Really Unofficial Campaign Bus Bench Signs, they were tasteless and despicable.
2.  As Official (and, yes, Darcee, that’s exactly what they are!) Campaign Bus Bench Signs, they violate City Code because there are way more than the allowed 25.
3.  As a declared “in-kind” donation, THEY ARE OUTRIGHT ILLEGAL!

According to my posse’s as-accurate-as-possible count, as of Sunday, April 10, 2011 there were 29, count ‘em, TWENTY NINE, Myron Bus Benches throughout North Miami Beach, including a couple in neighboring areas of North Miami and Miami-Dade County.  There are also at least two Myron Bus Shelters that I am personally aware of, bringing the risk of having to see Myron’s ugly mug while driving around up to 31 times on any given day.

While the few bus benches just outside our city limits don’t violate our City Code, all this advertising does violate the $500.00 campaign donation limit.  In fact, the total fair market value of this campaign advertising for three months beginning February 1, 2011 through April 30, 2011, based on the rates published by vendor Martin Outdoor Media, Inc.’s website, http://martinoutdoormedia.com/, I calculated to be worth a bare minimum of $20,970.00.

Yes, you read that correctly…A MINIMUM OF TWENTY THOUSAND NINE HUNDRED SEVENTY DOLLARS!

So, you gotta ask yourself how even someone as underhanded and manipulative as Myron can possibly have the freaking chutzpah to claim this advertising was worth FIVE HUNDRED DOLLARS!  Well, he did!  And he actually thinks we’re gonna buy it.

Seriously, Myron?  Did you REALLY think you’d get away with this blatant violation of Florida Campaign Finance Laws?  Seriously?  HA HA HA HA HA!

Darcee “I don’t need no stinkin’ Black’s Law Dictionary” Siegel may think she can get away with issuing a completely bogus “legal opinion” regarding your illegal campaign bus benches (Hey, Darcee: “I’ll get you, my pretty!”), but even she can’t cover your tuchus with this one.  Now, Myron, it’s your turn to have many sleepless nights.

Sweet dreams!

Stephanie Kienzle
“Spreading the Wealth”

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